This is unconventional, I know, but I’m slightly desperate for a job that doesn’t leave me asking, “Two for dinner?” over and over again while being berated by people (who think they deserve tables).
In short, I’m looking for a more fulfilling way to spend my time and earn my living.
And sure, most people wouldn’t consider administrative assistant a step up from where I am now, but I’m not most people. In fact, I know I’d rock the socks off of any administrative assistant position out there but would excel in a more creative atmosphere, like you are famous for having. This may sound odd but I enjoy office work – filing fulfills some sort of OCD urge to keep everything in its place. I like the constant change and requirements of an admin job; that there will be something needed from me everyday. There is also the problem-solving portion of this job which makes me quite happy because I’m happy finding solutions that make a day easier for someone else.
By the time this post goes up, you’ll have my information amidst a virtual-stack of other applications. What can set me apart? I mean, there are plenty of people out there that have held many similar jobs and feel they are the perfect fit for your company. Seriously, you’re Google, I’m pretty sure your application pool is in the thousands and nearly all are more impressive in the resume front than I. What would make you sit back and think: “Wow, this girl is pretty stellar. We should hire her.” I don’t think listing off my skills, the same skills you’ll see on all those other applications, will set me apart – in this day and age it’s not all that impressive to be an accomplished typist or able to use Excel; neither will listing my accomplishments, unless it was something really impressive and not just things I’m trying to pass off as impressive: “Successfully headed a project used to assist the improvement of the company.” How many times have you read a generic statement like that and felt yourself nod off a little? I wish my accomplishments listed as follows:
- Can recite “Moby Dick” in Latin to the tune of “Row, Row, Row Your Boat.”
- Elected President of the Gingers 2006-2010.
- Led a space expedition to Mars that resulted in the first USA colony taking root.
- Jumps tall buildings with ease.
Got your attention, didn’t I? I’d be rather proud of a list like that. Sadly the accomplishments that I list in my actual resume won’t be exciting. They won’t even have a tinge of intrigue. But, hey, maybe something about my resume will stand out to you and you’ll think, “Yes, let’s give this underwhelming girl a job.”
Well, here I am, in the middle of your applicant pool, screaming like an ignored toddler with a sugar high, trying to get your attention. Throw this job my way, Google, and you will be impressed – I won’t let you be anything but that.
Please hire me,